Category Archives: Help Getting It Done

I quit eating sugar this week.

Didn’t that just give you a shiver down your back? Quit sugar? ALL sugar? Surely not! But that’s what I did this week. I. Stopped. Eating. Sugar. If you’d have asked me a couple of weeks ago if I would do it, I’d have shaken my head sadly with a doubtful look on my face. But a few things happened to help me make this move. Let me catch you up.

About a year ago, I was finishing up my holistic nutrition program. Throughout the coursework there were many classes that mentioned the dangers of refined sugars. Certainly, some food philosophies are more stringent than others when it comes to the consumption of sugar, refined or not. And I understand the action of sugar in the body. Sugar is highly pro-inflammatory, triggers the release of insulin, and causes us to store fat easily. Burning sugar or carbohydrates for fuel in the setting of a standard American diet that contains lots of fat is a recipe for weight gain. That’s part of the philosophy behind very low carbohydrate diets – eliminate the carbs and the body has only protein and fat to use for fuel. Also, decreasing the inflammation from too much carbohydrate helps the body to release water weight, which is why many people immediately drop a few pounds when they start a low-carb diet.

But just because I knew all that, I still had very serious doubts about my ability (and willingness!) to stop eating sugar. I mean, what about my chocolate?! That was a non starter. I can do without a lot of things, but chocolate? Besides, I like bread and rice and crackers and pizza and cookies all kinds of things that either contain sugar or break down into sugar in the body. But mostly, I didn’t want to give up chocolate or cookies. I was eating those mini sized chocolates every day, and a cookie a few times a week. Not too much, right? So I can’t have a sugar problem, right?

Wrong. Here was the tip off: Every time I thought about experimenting with eliminating sugar from my diet, I got the willies. I’d figure out some sort of excuse for why it wasn’t a good idea or why I didn’t need to do it. I’d come up with another approach for dealing with the slow creep upward of the scale, though none of them seemed to be working. And I wasn’t eating very much, but I was grabbing a piece of chocolate to get me through lunchtime, or through the 3 o’clock low. That little voice kept piping up in the background, “You know it’s the sugar…” Getting on the scale was becoming such an ordeal, because I was having these wild shifts of weight on a daily basis, which I knew was water weight, but the net result was an overall gain. That doggone voice kept getting louder and louder until I finally got it. I was promoting inflammation in my body with the SUGAR. Did you know that inflammation is the root of all disease in the body? And here I was, nonchalantly adding to the inflammation I already experience because of lack of sleep, stress, chemical exposures, and normal life. That was it. I was tired, aggravated with the scale, and done with encouraging disease in my body.

So, HOW did I do it? I had a couple of secret weapons. First, I knew giving up chocolate cold turkey wasn’t going to happen, but I’d found a non-GMO stevia sweetened chocolate almond bar to have if things got rocky. I also Googled a sugar free double chocolate cookie recipe and realized that I had all the ingredients. At the same time, I found a new eating plan that I wanted to try out on myself. I figured that the research that would keep me distracted from the lack of sugar while I was eating other stuff on this plan. I handed off the cookie recipe to my girls and ordered a box of the stevia sweetened chocolates.

How did it go? It wasn’t as bad as I expected. I thought I would be crazy grumpy, irritable and miserable (that can happen from sugar withdrawal), but I wasn’t. I started eating the meals described every 3-4 hours, so I wasn’t grabbing for chocolate. Don’t get me wrong – I was tempted! But I could let it go by because I had other things to eat. But the proof was in the results. I noticed immediately that I started to drop water weight. Then I started getting really, truly hungry before my next meal was due, which told me that my metabolism was firing up.  And best of all, the scale started creeping down. Every day.

It’s been a successful week so far. The cookies were good (too much baking soda, but still yummy!). The sugar-free chocolate has been needed, but not as much as I expected. Overall, I feel good. Accomplished. You know how you feel when you do something you didn’t think you could? Yep, that’s how I feel right now. I had a moment today though.  My auntie was eating one of my special chocolate stash (which I’ve offered her) and I had a sugar panic moment that said “EAT ONE NOW BEFORE THEY’RE ALL GONE”. Then my rational brain kicked in and reminded me that I’d rather not undo the good I’ve started this week. The sugar isn’t in control now. Special chocolates can wait for a special occasion. I’m good!

My sugar free chocolate cookies

Have you ever tried to quit sugar? How’d it go? What have you done that you never thought you could? Please share in the comments below!

Here we are, in the time of family visits, gifting and caroling, decorating and lights. It’s a fun, busy, chaotic time of year! So I wanted to check in with you all: How are you doing? There seem to be so many reasons for joy and celebration, yet many are not finding that reality at all. Some people are remembering past losses and tragedies that occurred at this time of year, some are stressed out and overwhelmed. Not everyone is having a good time. Some of us are just holding our breath until it’s over! What about you?

Let me share a little about what I’m doing at this time of the year. This time is what I refer to in our family as “high season”. Starting with Halloween and the costumes, we follow that by an anniversary, hubby’s birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, then all four kid’s birthdays in the 30 days after Christmas. Whew! I try hard to be organized and order, shop and plan in advance, but it’s a hustle and I can’t say I always do it gracefully. This year, I’m also finishing my integrative nutrition school program, and there are a lot of shifts happening at work, much of which I am involved in because I now lead my group. This doesn’t include the ADLs (Activities of Daily Living – kids, church, work, cleaning, cooking, etc). Did I mention we also have family in town and I only took two days off work? Honestly, some days I just want to hide. In a hut. Far, far away.

So here are some of the things I’ve been doing this week:

Kids’ cleaning jobs, meaning MY cleaning jobs. They’re learning…

Crafty gifts for coworkers

Coats for Christmas coat drive – big ol’ mess in my hall…

So what do we do? Here’s my problem: I can’t seem to figure out what to eliminate. I know that there are 24 hours in a day, and if I load them up with too much, I will be strung out like a violin string. They snap, you know. That’s not the goal here, right? But I have all these great ideas and projects and responsibilities and I often can’t figure out what to eliminate to make my schedule more sane. Gotta go to work, have to do school to graduate, kids need to be fed and watered, the Christmas and birthday gifts won’t buy themselves you know. Besides, I bought all the supplies for that cute gifting project, I need to exercise so I don’t blow up with the holiday eating (don’t I?), and I have these pesky ethical considerations about the food for Christmas dinner, so…

It’s madness, really. I make it hard on myself. So when I found myself praying in a puddle on my closet floor this week, I knew my balance was completely off. There are lots of things that are required, but sometimes, some things are optional, even if they don’t feel like it. I had to make some quick changes and give up some stuff. I had to remind myself of this: if I “do it all”, and my attitude sucks because I’m anxious and sleep deprived and miserable, that’s what my family and I will remember; how hard and stress filled the holidays are, and how it’s a time just to get through. That’s not the memory I want, or want to give to my kids. So, what do I really want? Answering that helps me make those hard choices about what to keep and what to cut.

Making granola for family breakfasts

This may sound a little woo-woo, but I’m setting an intention. My intention is to create a welcoming and warm environment in my home and between my family members. That’s more important than getting every detail right. So, I have to make what I do manageable for me. Then I can give myself to them, not just gifts and activities. Someone told me a long time ago that mama sets the tone of the home. Remember “If mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy”? Well, like it or not, I’ve found it to be true. And no one can pour from an empty reservoir. You may have different ones than I’m making, but here are my cuts…

No Work

The afternoon I was supposed to start my two day break from work, I was sitting at my computer fighting through the February schedule for the thirteen health care providers I supervise. A bunch of changes came out and I was tempted to leave on my work phone in case someone needed me to make more changes as the week unfolded. Then I thought about that.  I made the December schedule to accommodate EVERYONE’s vacation requests, including several who will be off all next week. I am working next week. So, I finished the schedule, sent it out, and let all who may care know that I’ll be back on Monday (the office holiday – I’ll be on call). I’m practicing setting my boundaries. Phone off.

Daily Exercise

So, yes, exercise can help keep you balanced and more even-keeled during times of stress. I highly recommend it to you all. BUT, in my case, sometimes an extra 30 minutes of sleep is the more critical need. I’m not saying I quit exercising, just maybe not every day. And I’m definitely looking to do restorative yoga, or qi gong – I ask my body what it needs that day and give it that. The heart pounding exercise hasn’t been on the list. Not this week.

No dishes for Christmas.

I just can’t. I mean, I’m all environmental and green and stuff, but if I’ve got to do all the cooking and clean all the dishes, I’ll probably go postal. The thought of a properly set table with china, silver, and all the Pinterest inspired crafty centerpieces is so pretty and ideal, but the thought of having to make that happen too makes my blood pressure go up. I suppose enlisting the family to do the dishes is an option, but I’m a little uptight about the state of my kitchen and I can’t seem to stay out of it when it’s a mess. I bought cute matching paper plates and napkins. I’ll put them on shiny red chargers. Pinterest fans, it’ll be fine, really and truly. Me washing the dinner dishes? Out.

The Completely Organic Christmas Dinner

I tried y’all, I really did. And I feel like a big ol’ hypocrite, but they wanted that commercial ham with the crunchy sugar glaze, and despite my ethical objections and desire for a responsible raised piece of pork, I caved. It was too easy and the alternative too hard this year. I did buy an organic turkey and will do all the sides from scratch, but the ham got me. I’ve got a lead on a local pig farm for next year though…

Christmas cards

Not happening. Every year, I feel a twinge when my family and friends send me these beautiful family Christmas cards. I feel it when someone at church hands me their card too. I always think, “You know, I should save these return addresses and make a list so that next year I can give our family Christmas card to everyone too!” But really, no. Maybe in a few years…

Christmas cookies

Ok, I’m still trying to decide on this one. I have a gluten free sugar cookie recipe that I want to try to make with the kids, so they can make star shaped cookies for Santa. (GF because the 3 year old’s eczema has been on fire and I’m trying a GF diet for her – I have to DO something!). But if Saturday is crazy, it may become a grab-the-slice-and-bake-at-the-grocery-store. Gotta know when to pull the ripcord!

The family hearth, complete with welcoming fire. Ahhh, the vibe I want!

How do you grab on to the joy and good of the holidays and limit the chaos? Where do you make your cuts? Share in the comments section below!

Ok everyone, here comes the final installment of the Good For You Series. What could possibly be the last essential thing we need to incorporate into our lives to help us feel balanced, centered, and whole? Well, exercise of course!

Ok, ok, I hears some groans already. So, if you don’t like to exercise, I get where you’re coming from. I felt that way for most of my life. If you want to read about how to turn this around, go to my post Learning to Love Exercise. It may help…

On the other hand, if you already love exercise, maybe you don’t even need to read this post. So what are we going to talk about? I want to expand our definition of exercise a little. There are a few pitfalls that I’m finding that I and others are falling into when we think about exercise.

The first pit we fall into when we think about exercise is around WHY we exercise. Fairly frequently, I will be talking to a patient about weight and they say, “Yeah, I really need to start exercising again.” Many people exercise because they want to lose weight. And I agree that exercise is a good thing for the body, in lots of ways. But in order to burn enough calories to actually lose weight, you have to be an elite athlete and be 18 years old! Don’t get me wrong, I think exercise is important, but alone it’s not the key to weight loss. Getting into a good exercise routine helps us to make better food choices and stick to our chosen eating plan. We do more things that help us take care of ourselves when we are exercising. But the benefits to exercise are far greater than losing a couple of pounds. Exercise strengthens our hearts, improves our sleep, helps our bowel function, keeps our bones strong and keeps our joints limber.

So what’s the real reason we exercise? Everyone wants to be healthy – no one would choose to be sick! So, we exercise for health. Did you know that the word “health” comes from the word “whole”? And isn’t that what we are striving for? To become whole? So what if instead of “doing my cardio”, or “working on my upper body”, we used our exercise as a way to encourage wholeness within ourselves? What might that look like in our lives?

Walking the beach…

Another trouble area we get into is thinking that only certain strenuous exercise is worthwhile. The “if I can’t run on the treadmill for at least 45 minutes, I might as well cash it in” mentality. Hardcore, sweaty, blood pumping exercise is great for your heart and lungs, helps tone your muscles and burn some energy. But other, less intense exercise counts too. There are incredible benefits to exercise in yoga, qi gong, Tai Chi. Sure, rocking out with weights or taking a high impact Zuumba class is good for your mind and body. But what if evolution was the focus of exercise? Not just fat-blasting or body sculpting or getting an endorphin high, but actually connecting the mind and body, facilitating the union of your higher self with your physical self? What might you be able to become if your mind and body were more whole and connected? See, I think we often treat our minds as separate from our bodies, not remembering that much of our body can be brought under the conscious control of our minds. But we have to connect them, link them, join them, so that they work together. Any kind of exercise practice can help the health of the brain, and health in our bodies helps keep the brain strong. But if the purpose of exercise was to strengthen the mind-body connection, then yoga with its balance and stretching, qi gong energy work and other practices can bring us into a level of union between our mind and body that we may not reach in other ways.

The little one practicing yoga with Mommy…

And what is exercise? It may not be a gym workout. Ever heard of kundalini yoga? There are techniques with breathing in this type of yoga that will energize your internal organs, shift your energy completely around, and make you sweat and you’re still sitting down! And qi gong can help you to go into a deeper more settled space in your self. That energy you want to take along on your day! Sometimes, between the crash diets and extreme exercise, we treat our bodies so harshly that they don’t relax and unwind, ever. Then we wonder why they don’t do what we want! Sometimes, what we really need is restoration and connection, and we can use exercise to do this for ourselves.

Getting my sunlight AND balance in!

So certainly, lift the weights, pound the pavement, play some hoops. But maybe you incorporate some other ancient mind-body exercise into your routine too. Your knees may not let you jog forever, but you can do yoga, tai chi, and qi gong into your elder years!

What kind of exercise helps you feel your best? Share more in the comments section below!

Glad to have you back! Here we are at week four of the Good For You Series. We’ve covered some important needs and have been working to get more of the good stuff we need into our daily lives; good sleep, gratitude, human touch.  I hope you’ve been able to increase all of these in your days, at least a little of each! I caught a cold a week ago (because I was doing too much), so I immediately starting my immune boosting program, including more sleep. What’s my immune boosting program? Well, that’ll have to be another post. Suffice it to say, this cold only bothered me for a total of three days, instead of being miserable for the full 7-10 days. Sleep was a big part of the healing, for sure! I also have been giving more conscious hugs and I’m working on my third list of 1000 things I’m grateful for. I’m growing in this series too!

So what are we going to talk about this week? We haven’t talked about food yet! I left this one for later in the series because so many people think that eating a whole foods diet is hard work, so I wanted to add other good things in first. But really, what kinds of food you consume can completely change your mood, sleep, energy, weight (of course), and your physical makeup. You can medicate (or poison yourself) with what you put in your mouth. Did you know that in addition to the childhood obesity epidemic, some children and young adults are developing fatty liver disease because of the amount of sugar (sodas, sugary foods, high fructose corn syrup) they consume? We used to only see that in chronic alcoholics…

Anyway, let’s get to the good stuff! I’m going to share a few tactics I use to make sure I can get whole foods for my meals. I don’t buy much in boxes (cereal for the kids and crackers, though I have made them too). Dinner doesn’t have to be rip open a box and add water or order out again. Just a little planning and a whole food dinner is served!

Zucchini and onion

Think ahead and buy what you want to eat

I like to shop at a farmer’s market. They carry so many different kinds of fruits and veggies and I like to try new things! But no matter where you shop, you can think before you go about what kinds of things you want to cook. Then buy one new one and google a recipe. You might find a new favorite!

Use aromatics!

You can chop up an onion and garlic and add to almost any veggie, saute it up, and it’s pure deliciousness in minutes. Onions and garlic are not only nutritional powerhouses, but they make everything taste good! Cabbage, kale, mushrooms, zucchini, squash, spinach… A couple of minutes chopping, stirring, add salt and pepper and you’re done! Maybe a few herbs too…

Sauteeing the onions in my sage-rosemary compound butter from Thanksgiving… 

Prep your food

If I know I want to cook something the next day, I’ll often do the “mise en place” (french for “everything in place”) and do the chopping ahead of time. If I cut up the onions, garlic, and veggie of choice, season the chicken parts or measure out the quinoa, put them in their own bags, then the cooking part is just kind of a dump-and-stir. The prep work I can do in 15 minutes in the evening, but that’s 15 minutes I don’t have when I want the food on the plates the next day!

Cook in advance

I boil eggs and keep them in the frig, or cook enough chicken legs for several meals and freeze some. I love to make soup – eat it once and freeze bags for later! It’s hard to freeze rice, but breads, pastas, meats, and lots of other things freeze well. Cook multiple meals at one time, and you can defrost in the morning and warm it for dinner when you can’t cook that night. Sauteed veggies can be thrown over fresh greens for a lunch or dinner salad and boiled eggs travel well for a breakfast at your desk. Your cooking efforts can pay off for multiple meals!

My beautiful farm eggs! Breakfast, egg salad…

What do you do to make sure you get whole foods in your diet? This one was short and sweet. If you want actual recipes, let me know. Share in the comments section below!

Hello all! Everyone over their turkey and football coma? Actually, the tryptophan-turkey, sleepiness-after-eating-turkey thing is probably overblown, but it’s a nice excuse to nap away the afternoon on Thanksgiving Day. You’d think that I was going to say something this week about healthy eating, or clean eating, or something that will help you clean up your act after the overindulgences of last week. Well, I’m not. Holidays are for making fun memories, and I don’t think that goes well with a dollop of guilt on top. If you overdid it, next year make a smaller plate and enjoy small plates of leftovers the days after. That is all…

So, what are we talking about this week? What do we desperately need to get into our lives that we often are missing? This week is going to be fun, easy, and no-calorie. We can indulge in this to our hearts delight and not worry that we’ll see it on the scale the next day. This week we are going to meet our need for human touch.

As a society, we are touch-starved. Even if you are in a relationship or have children, we often don’t get touched very much. We pay for nourishing physical touch from our massage therapists or other professionals. Think about it: What’s the best part of a pedicure (unless you’re really ticklish)? The leg and foot rub, of course! I’m certainly not suggesting we don’t get massages and pedicures, but I am suggesting that those activities meet a greater need than relaxation or pampering. As we’ve gotten more “advanced” in our society, we’ve also gotten further apart from each other. We live in bigger houses, drive alone in our cars, eat in front of the TV, and all sleep in our own rooms. I remember thinking it was odd when my oldest daughter (who had her own room at the time), complained that she was “the only one who had to sleep alone”. See, the twins slept in the same room, and mommy and daddy slept in the same room, so she was lonely! I hadn’t thought about it that way…

Did you know that there are actually scientific studies done on the benefits of hugs? (Google it.  I’ll wait…)  Studies have shown that hugs stimulate the release of a bonding hormone called oxytocin, and that touch helps lower blood pressure, possibly through the release of hormones that decrease stress. Oxytocin release can cause better immune function, lower heart rate and reactivity to stress, reduce inflammation and allow better pain tolerance. I need more of that in my life! Bring on the hugging!

One reason I think we are touch-starved is that we are aware on a deep level that touch is intimate, and we want to be sure that our physical actions don’t send sexual messages unless we mean them. And this is smart! It’s really important that we don’t confuse the need for human touch for the need for sex, and just as important that we don’t send signals for sex when we want human touch. People make this mistake often and try to meet their need for human touch with sex, sometimes casual in nature. Ultimately, this is why this kind of sexual contact doesn’t meet our need in the way we hope – we’re trying to meet our need with a lesser substitute. Now, don’t get me wrong, sex is (or can be) a wonderful, bonding and fun physical contact, and if that’s what you are asking for, then that’s how to get that need met. You just can’t fill the need for touch by substituting sex. And here’s my disclaimer for my younger and/or celibate readers: sex can bring plenty of complications to your life, especially if you are not in a good, safe relationship (and sometimes even if you are!). Open that box and fill that need when you have the support and love around you to do it safely, and only when you are fully ready for all that it brings. 

Whether you are having sex or not, meeting the need for human touch is essential. So how do we do it? Seems like things could get awkward if you just run around randomly touching folk, right? And how do we do this without mixing our signals to the people receiving our touch? Well, here are a few guidelines to follow…

One, start with people you are close to. Friends, spouse, kids. You can more easily explain to them that you just want a hug or a snuggle, and they are most likely to understand you. 

Two, ask permission. If you are friendly with someone at work and want to give a hug, ask first. “Is it ok if I hug you?” will usually do the trick. Usually they say yes without hesitation. If they hesitate, it’s ok to give them an out. “It’s ok if you’d rather not” with a smile is good. Don’t take it personally if someone says no – some people are uncomfortable with touch, so it may have nothing to do with you. If you are uncomfortable with touch, practice with those mentioned in tip #1.

Three, if you’re going to hug those outside of family and close friends, hug people of your same gender. It cuts down on those mixed messages we talked about earlier.  If you are going to hug someone of the opposite gender, you may want to consider whether a full frontal hug will bring up sexual feelings, either for you or the other person. We want to be able to fill this need for touch, but we should be wise while going about it. Touch is intimate, and is supposed to be, so choose carefully who and when you touch someone.

Four, hold hands. Younger kids will still hold your hand, and your spouse might just have forgotten that you used to do this when you were dating! Ask them, and then enjoy the feeling of another hand in yours. Maybe get or give a hand, foot or shoulder massage. It feels good to give and to receive…

Aria still likes to hold mommy’s hand…

Five, cuddle up together. Pile your kids around you on the couch with blankets and read or watch a movie together. Snuggle with your honey. It’s easy to be rushing out the house in the morning and barely given each other a peck on the way out the door. That’s fine for a quick goodbye, but doesn’t do much for building closeness. Spend a few moments – it’ll last you much longer than it takes!

So that brings me to the last thing: How do you get a good hug? The most important thing is to slow down. This isn’t a nice-to-see-you hug. Wrap your arms around the other person and gently hold them close. Then breathe, in and out, at least twice. Usually this gives you and the other person time to slow your heart rates and enjoy the moment. The great thing is, you and the other person both are filled up with this kind of hug. Both giving, both receiving. Everyone smiles!

Alright everyone, ready to go out and get and give some hugs? Ready to fill up that tank with human touch? Go out there this week and hold close some people you love. You’ll feel great!

What are your favorite ways to meet your need for human touch? Share in the comments section below!

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I have wonderful memories of being at my grandmother’s house, hanging out with my cousins, eating the turkey, cornbread stuffing (dressing?), stewed tomatoes, sweet potatoes, rolls, collards, and on and on. It’s a day about family, food and football. Every year, when the Christmas decorations come out earlier and earlier in the stores, I remember the reason Thanksgiving gets skipped over: There’s no real commercial aspect to exploit. That’s the biggest reason I like Thanksgiving – it’s all about abundance, giving, and spending time with people you love. Not spending money and running around in stores (except for the food!).

My white pumpkin centerpiece this year…

I’m sad about Thanksgiving this year though. I’m on call for 24 hours on Thanksgiving, so I didn’t prepare a big dinner, because I may not be here to cook it! Since we can’t travel and don’t have family here to do the dinner, we were invited to a friend’s house to share their dinner. The nice thing is, Perry and the kids will have a Thanksgiving dinner, even if I can’t go. But I’m hoping and praying I will be able to go. And I’m cooking our turkey and sides on Friday (no, I’m not participating in Black Friday shopping – I just can’t fight crowds for stuff!). We gotta have Thanksgiving leftovers!

The holidays can be hard too, though. Many people are missing loved ones who have passed on, and some have endured tragedies in holidays past. All the hustle can be a bit much too; the preparations and the cooking and the cleaning, travel and packing. All the running around and doing can make you want to pack up like a hermit and not come out until the new year. Maybe that’s just me. I have five birthdays and an anniversary to celebrate in addition to the holidays between Halloween and the end of January, so this is definitely the “high season” in our family. It’s a lot!

So here’s what I’m learning: It’s all about how you look at it. I can so easily pick apart all the challenges and difficulties, even create a few in my head that never happen, and then I feel so rushed and worn out. You wonder why some people are ready for this season to be over? This is why. But I’m learning how to slow things down. And this is part two of Getting the Good We Need: Gratitude. ‘TIs the season!

Our grateful tree with our most cherished gifts…

There are lots of reasons to be grateful. The benefits to a gratitude practice include: